It is extremely common for separating couples to disagree with each other, especially about sensitive matters such as finances and children. Family mediation is a series of meetings that encourages separating couples to talk openly and constructively, and to make decisions about their future together.
Mediation takes place when a partnership or marriage has already broken down – it is not therapy or counselling. A trained family mediator facilitates your conversation in a neutral, compassionate and non-judgmental way and will support you to reach agreements. This reduces conflict and minimises the emotional and financial strain that is often felt when going through the courts. As family mediation lawyers, we also give information about the legal process so that you agree on a realistic and fair settlement.
Meet our family mediator, Helen Clyne, who offers family mediation services in person at our office in St Albans or remotely via Teams to separating couples who need to resolve child arrangements and financial issues.
Debenhams Ottaway’s family mediation solicitors work with individuals, couples, parents, and same-sex couples in Hertfordshire, London, and across the UK and internationally. We will do all that we can to make the whole process as amicable and painless as possible, and we will help you reality test different options to help you reach the best solutions for you and your family.
Contact our family mediation solicitors in St Albans and Radlett
If you’re keen to explore family mediation and non-court separation or divorce, or need help with any other areas of family law, please contact us today on 01727 837161 or email us on lawyers@debenhamsottaway.co.uk
We have local offices in St Albans and Radlett, with clients from across Hertfordshire and London and can meet with you remotely on Microsoft Teams or Zoom.
Family mediation services
Family mediation can be a positive process – you set the agenda and discuss the personal issues most important to you in a safe space and at your own pace. Your conversations are guided by Helen Clyne, a trained mediator, in a sensitive way so you better understand each other’s points of view as you work together towards making constructive decisions about the future.
Issues that can be covered in mediation include:
- Financial settlements
- Child maintenance payments
- Property and possessions
- Child custody
Once an agreement is reached, documents outlining the decisions can be used by your respective lawyers, who will help finalise this for you. You are likely to find that mediation offers a faster and more cost-effective way to make decisions about your future.
Initial Meetings
The first step in the mediation process is an initial assessment. Our specialist family mediator, Helen Clyne, will talk to you and your former partner separately about family mediation, whether it is the best approach for you to take and how you need to approach the sessions to get the most out of them. Mediation is not always appropriate, particularly if there are any safeguarding concerns, which Helen will always consider and discuss with you.
Whilst family mediation is voluntary, there is an expectation by the courts that you and your partner will have attempted mediation before making a court application.. You do not need to attend mediation if the court grants an exemption, for example, due to an urgent need or domestic abuse.
Family mediation sessions
Once you and your former partner have agreed to mediation, you will meet with Helen in a neutral place where you feel comfortable to talk openly with your former partner. Helen will guide the conversation to ensure that you discuss the matters that you want to cover and will ensure that you both have the opportunity to talk, and to listen with the shared goal that you both have ownership of the decisions affecting your future after you have separated. You remain in control of the mediation sessions and the topics discussed, and discussions remain confidential unless there is a risk of harm to a child or vulnerable adult.
The majority of mediation sessions last about 90 minutes. The number of sessions depends on you and your needs but average 3-5 sessions.
Child arrangements
It is important for parents to establish a new type of relationship after separation for the wellbeing of children. Mediation offers time to discuss your new co-parenting journey and ensure that children remain at the centre of any decisions made. During mediation you may wish to discuss the ‘big’ issues, such as living arrangements, but it is also the time to discuss how you and your former partner will communicate, holidays, how you will manage special occasions such as birthdays, pocket money, and so on. Making these decisions together means that you have a say in your child’s future rather than having to manage court-imposed arrangements that you may not agree with.
As family law solicitors and family mediation lawyers, we understand the sensitivity of these discussions and will take time to help you understand the issues involved as well as your legal rights and responsibilities towards your children. When you reach an agreement on child arrangements, you may choose for us to prepare a parenting plan which records the arrangements agreed. You can rely on this as a clear record of your agreements and can use it to support an application for a court order to ensure the terms will be binding.
Financial dispute resolution
Family mediation sessions are often used for resolving financial disputes or to discuss ongoing financial arrangements after a divorce or separation. During mediation, both participants share information about their financial situation and openly discuss future needs. Finances can be confusing, and you may feel anxious about the future, but Debenhams Ottaway’s family mediator, Helen Clyne, will ensure the pace of mediation is right for you, will provide you with helpful information and encourage you to seek legal advice when you need it.
When you reach an agreement about your finances, Helen will draft a Memorandum of Understanding summarising the solutions you have reached.. This will be accompanied by an open financial statement recording the financial information and documents you both provided during mediation. The Memorandum of Understanding is not legally binding so you will need to contact your solicitor to get a court order by consent to ensure that the terms are binding.
Why work with Debenhams Ottaway’s family mediation lawyers?
We understand that separation and divorce is an emotional time, and you are likely to be facing huge uncertainty about the future. Our team of family law solicitors and family mediation experts work in all areas of family law and divorce, and will take you through the procedure step-by-step in a straightforward and helpful way.
Family mediation is just one of the ways that we help to make the process as amicable and painless as possible, as we keep the wellbeing of your family at the heart of every decision. It’s about giving you the power to shape your future and create a new, constructive relationship with your former partner, when needed.
Frequently asked questions about family mediation
Family mediation is a series of meetings during which you and your former partner discuss and work through the personal issues that are most important to you in your separation. It is a voluntary process and you can address various issues including child arrangements, financial matters, property division, and parenting. Think of it as a safe space where you set the agenda and progress at your pace.
The purpose of family mediation is to encourage and maintain a healthy dialogue so that both participants have ownership of any decisions. Discussions are guided by a mediator, a neutral third party, who supports both parties and helps to minimise conflict.
In short, mediation hands you control of the decisions that have to be made after a separation. From which issues you wish to discuss, to the timetable for making decisions, all this is decided by you and your former partner giving you the flexibility to focus on what’s important to you and your family.
Mediation also helps to keep your relationship amicable and constructive, which is important for the long-term, particularly if you have children together. Making decisions together, assisted by a mediator, encourages a positive relationship as you work out solutions that work best for your family.
Important for many, mediation is often faster and cheaper than resolving these issues through the courts or solicitors.
If you want a safe space where you can try to resolve disputes in an amicable manner, then family mediation dispute resolution could work for you. Family mediation can be particularly helpful where children are involved as it is important to keep children at the forefront of any decision making and for parents to be as non-confrontational as possible.
However, separations without children can benefit from mediation as it delivers a means to resolve disputes in a positive way. You remain in control of the conversation, the topics discussed, and the pace of any decision making. This means that it is more likely that any decisions will be adhered to as you have both played a part in reaching the agreement.
Family mediation is suitable for all aspects of family law from divorce to separation, including:
- Divorce and the financial arrangements resulting from divorce
- Child arrangements following separation
- Property concerns relating to unmarried families
- Nuptial agreements
- Moving to another country with your children following separation
- Subsequently reviewing child arrangements or maintenance payments.
Family mediation is confidential (with some exceptions such as for safeguarding) and it is ‘without prejudice’ for financial issues, which means that you can talk openly without the fear of what you say being used against you in the future ). This means that mediation is a safe space to openly discuss issues with the common goal that you will come to a mutually agreeable solution.
Please be aware that any financial disclosure is open (in contrast to ‘without prejudice’) which means it can be considered by any solicitors involved and the court.
Contact our Family Mediation Solicitors in St Albans and Radlett
If you keen to explore family mediation and non-court separation or divorce, or need assistance with any other areas of family law, please contact us today on 01727 837161 or email us on lawyers@debenhamsottaway.co.uk.
We have local offices in St Albans and Radlett, with clients from across Hertfordshire and London.